Today I’m going to be chatting all about my favourite things, people and experiences I’ve gone through in the past few months. Many people online either do a round -up at the end of the month, or include just beauty, fashion etc. but, as usual, I’m throwing all the norms out of the window and I’m just going to share with you the things that have made me genuinely happy through 2019 so far. Some you will have heard of before, and some will be new, but I hope it inspires some of you that there is beauty in the everyday and that if sometimes you’re not having the greatest party on this planet, there is always goodness around.
Now, when I say knitwear I don’t mean the itchy kind. Nor do I mean the ugly cardigans that you may have been forced to wear as a child. No, when I say knitwear, I mean the clouds of comfort you get to wear on your shoulders when the weather is slightly chilly (or not, up to you). To me, especially when I’m having a bad fibro/cfs day, there is nothing more comfy than whacking on a comfy pair of leggings and the cosiest, most oversized jumper. My absolute favourite ones are from H&M who always have the right combination of softness, oversized-ness and practicality, all in the most gorgeous neutral tones. I also adore the oversized sweatshirts from the likes of Primark and Pull and Bear. If I could, I would have a whole set of drawers dedicated to cosy jumpers, but, much to my dismay, Will and Dad always (try) and stop me from buying more as I have ‘too many’- pffttt.
Here are some that have caught my eye recently:
A show that I binge-watched recently is After Life, written and directed by, and starring, Ricky Gervais who I’m not always majorly keen on, but he’s shown a whole different side of him in this show and now I think he’s ace. After Life is all about a guy who suffers after his wife passes away from Cancer. He gives up on himself and life and becomes suicidal (don’t worry there’s no really tragic scenes to do with this), but instead of taking his life, he decides he would rather live and punish those around him for the loss of his wife. I don’t want to ruin anything but basically he finds it harder than he thought as he begins to see the goodness around him. Now, be warned, there’s a LOT of swearing in this, and while I don’t advocate it (even though I do it more than I should), I find the humour in the series, rather than focusing on the language I don’t agree with. It’s made me laugh and cry and just describes perfectly what it feels like to lose someone you love. One of my favourite quotes from the show is “Happiness is amazing. It’s so amazing it doesn’t matter if it’s yours or not.”
Something that I’ve been doing that has been lifting my spirits right up is exercise. Due to being diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and CFS at the beginning of last year, throughout the rest of the year I was either bed-bound or just unable to exercise due to the pain and severe lack of energy. Seeing as I am a lot better now I’ve been able to start exercising a lot more and it’s really really helped my mental health. I’m not able to exercise every day yet and sometimes I don’t have much energy so a workout wipes me out, but I’ve been loving getting my body moving more and actually getting my fitness levels back up! I also try and walk a little more every time I walk Jasper (if his legs can handle, bless his little heart) which helps any fibro pain and mental health worries fade a little bit and the fresh air makes anyone feel that little bit happier.
Oh my goodness what a beautiful, positive difference this one has made! As some of you will know (I debated saying anything but I’m not going to shy away with what happens) I’ve been subject to indirect nastiness on twitter and to be honest, every time I enter, check, and exit Twitter, I always feel a little more negative. Whether this is because I’ve seen sad news, people being veryyy negative or have just found out something I didn’t want to, I always left the app consciously aware that I was a little more worried than I was before. I stuck with it because it is a great way to share new blog posts and to support your friends, but since deleting it I have felt so much better- yay!
FINDING MY CONFIDENCE AGAIN
Something that I feel people might never be aware of until they go through it themselves, is the impact a chronic illness can have on your confidence. Last year I pretty much became a shell of myself due to many reasons. I was bed-bound and gained a little weight, I was being bullied, I was going through grief counselling and also suffering still with severe anxiety and depression. It wasn’t nice and I just lost all confidence in myself as I thought it was my fault I was like that. However, by researching and chatting to some people who really know what they’re talking about, I’ve come to see that chronic illnesses are very rarely the individual’s fault. Through knowing this, completing my grief counselling and doing more things that make me happy, I’ve been slowly but surely becoming the old Lizzie again. I’ve lost some weight, I’ve been eating food that makes me feel good, I’ve got so much support around me and, as my gorgeous friend Kim said, I’ve ‘got my sparkle back’. I’m having a hair change (hopefully) next week which will give me even more confidence and I’m so excited to grow onwards and upwards into this new (yet somehow old) me.
I’ve said this before, but honestly words can’t explain how grateful I feel to have met so many amazing people online through blogging. When I started this little journey I had no idea about the blogging community and I genuinely didn’t expect to gain any friendships, I just wanted to have my own creative area on the internet. Right from when I first started my blogging instagram I received so many lovely messages and I’m so blessed to say it has just grown since then. I’ve made genuine lifelong friends and have met so many lovely guys and gals- words truly can’t say how much these people lift me up and support me. I’ve included a few of my absolute closest chums below and a couple who I’ve had the pleasure of chatting to and getting to know more recently. I just want all of you who I talk to to know I appreciate you all so friggin’ much and (as cheesy as this sounds, I do apologise) I’m so glad you’re on this little journey with me!
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD
Since going through grief counselling and being diagnosed with my chornic illnesses, I found my faith faltering a bit. I was angry at God and I didn’t understand why all of this horrible stuff was happening to my family, when it seems that no one else around me was suffering at all. Last year was hard because of this but this year I’ve been drawing closer to God again and I feel so so much more at peace. I know that everything happens for a reason- He made these things happen for a reason and if I look, something good has always come out of something bad happening. I’m praising him singing in the shower and while I get ready, I’m able to go to church and draw closer to Him rather than getting upset and I’m able to openly talk about my faith again. I’m so thankful for everything I do have and even though some things might get a bit much sometimes, I know He’s always there.
As someone who’s always been afraid of change, I’ve really been trying to embrace change this year. It’s been a bit hit and miss, some times I’ve FREAKED OUT about change and other times I’ve been pretty chill when usually I would be panicking. Change is good, change is healthy and I’m excited for even more positive changes this year that are to come!
I hope you enjoyed this little summary of what I’ve been loving. Let me know anything you’ve been particularly loving throughout the year so far in the comments below
With wishes for a lovely week ahead and my love as always,